Fallen Leaves - Chapter 2: They Don't Know About Us

Kerass stood still while his thoughts ran rampant. He was silently begging her to respond. Any response would be fine by this point. Anything that relieved the awkward tension of this one-way conversation. With a dispirited sigh, Kerass turned around and began to walk away.

“Wait!” Cadence called out after him.

He turned back around and entered the classroom looking straight into her eyes. It was a look that could see through any lie that she would conjure up. “Well, will you?” he asked dryly, his eyes never straying even for a millisecond from his gaze on her.

“What do you need…or should I say want help with?” she asked, her voice shaking.

“I don’t have friends.” he started to say. She instantly started laughing. He told her that if she was just going to treat it like a joke then he was wasting his time. He didn’t want to be wrong about her, she had seemed different, but he was obviously wrong.

She responded that she was sorry. It had taken her aback, so her natural response was to laugh at any shock that came her way. “You seem like you have all the friends in the world. I don’t see why you would need support from this group or even friends for that matter.”

“They only care about one thing and that’s not me. They don’t give a crap about me. They only care about my stats,” he sighed utterly frustrated and disappointed in the whole situation. Breaking the silence he said, “All right, if you don’t want to help me then that’s fine.”

“It’s just awkward for me ok. You’re the only person who showed up. I don’t think this group should be just a one-on-one thing. Listen,” she began. She explained that if he were to bring at least one other person then she would do whatever she could to make him more confident with himself. She promised she would be his friend, but he would have to bring at least one other person along with him.

“All right, you’ve got yourself a deal,” he said. They exchanged brief goodbyes before Kerass walked out of the classroom. He crumpled up the announcement for the peer support group which he held in his hand. Seeing the poster for The Crucible his eyes lit up. Tossing the peer support group announcement in the nearest trashcan, he walked down the now deserted hallways pondering on how he would ever get Jay to agree to a peer support group. If he were to get Jay to agree, he would have to be honest with him about his depression. Honesty wasn’t one of Kerass’ strongest qualities. He had the best poker face of anyone in the freshmen class, aside from maybe the new girl. The only way he could truly get the support that he wanted was to grab Jay and drag him into the group himself. He reassured himself that if he couldn’t trust Jay, his best friend, he wouldn’t be able to trust anyone. Then why did he still feel dirty about telling Jay about his depression? He could be genuine with Jay, he knew that as a certainty…but he still felt uncomfortable with letting Jay completely in.

Turning the corner walking down the science hallway to his locker, he heard sniffling. He walked down the hallway hearing it echoing down the hall. Whoever it was was attempting to hide in the stairwell. It was a good hiding place when you didn’t want to be seen, however everything you said was amplified from the higher ceilings. He walked down the hallway to see who it was and if they needed any help. Walking down the first set of stairs reaching the landing between floors, he found Jay in the corner balled up and crying.

“Jay, what happened?” Kerass asked.

Jay looked up surprised that Kerass had found him in this condition. “It’s nothing really I’m fine.” Kerass told Jay he was a terrible liar which brought a small smile to Jay’s face. “Do you want the good news or the bad news first?” Kerass stared blankly at him. Jay told him that the good news was that he would be able to see his football game Friday afternoon.

“Is play practice cancelled?” Kerass asked in response.

“Let me finish,” Jay said with sheer devastation. “I got let go.” Sighing he continued saying that the director felt that he was so far behind with his line memorization that he wouldn’t be able to partake in the show anymore.

Kerass placed his hand on Jay’s shoulder. Jay leaned into Kerass crying in his shoulder. He didn’t say a word. This was a silent unspoken moment between the two. Their friendship supported each other in any way they possibly could. A bond this strong could not be openly shown at Oak Stream High without rumors flying around about each of their sexualities being questioned. Nothing was said between them and neither would ever mention this moment to each other again.



The rest of the week flew by for Cadence, but something inside of her had changed. She smiled a lot more than she had ever done since she had transferred to Oak Stream High. Slowly but surely, more and more makeup was being applied to her face. Walking down the stairs on Friday, her mother finally asked about what had changed over the course of the week. “I thought you had said nobody showed up to the peer support group.”

Setting her book bag by the door and sitting down at the dining room table Cadence said, “I told you one person showed up.” Her mom responded saying that she thought she was thinking of dropping the group all together. Her smile gave her away. She was wearing mascara. “Who’s the guy?”

“What guy?” Cadence asked surprised that her mom had noticed. Her mother pointed out that she was wearing her mascara. She responded that she had changed her mind about beauty products and that she wanted to slowly start applying it on. Her mother just stared at her with her arms crossed. “Can’t I just be happy?” Cadence asked.

Her mother shook her head. The more questions she asked, the bigger Cadence’s smile became, but she wouldn’t budge. Her mother let her go rush off to the bus stop hoping and praying that her newfound happiness would last.

The bus rolled up at the usual time. Cadence stepped on and took her usual spot up front, only now when she looked to the back of the bus Kerass was no longer sleeping but wide awake beaming at her. He got up and walked down the isle and sat right beside her.

“I think I know how to save your club,” Kerass said.

“How?” Cadence responded. She didn’t look at his face while she asked. She wasn’t sure why, but ever since he had stared straight at her after school that day she couldn’t look him straight in the eyes.

He laughed asking if she was still intimidated. He reassured her that he would reserve that stare for the football field. She was now able to look at his face but not directly into his eyes. “Jay. I’m gonna ask Jay,” he said.

“And what makes you so certain that he’ll want to join? I mean…he wasn’t the one that showed up after school.”

Kerass asked if she was kidding. He was certainly a lot happier. She couldn’t tell if this was an act or not, but she decided to play along. He had repeatedly been nicer to her and her mom had noticed that morning that she was a lot more giddy than she had ever been. His voice drew her back into their conversation. “Jay’s my best friend. He’ll do anything for me. Plus, I think he needs it.”

“Now come on, that’s a little bold of you to speak directly for him,” she said and instantly regretted speaking her mind so bluntly. “I love that you want to save the group, Kerass, but maybe it’s just a lost cause. I mean, you and I can still be friends,” she said a lot more gingerly.

“No, I really think I can get him to say yes,” he said. Now she looked straight into his eyes. They seemed so genuine, so real. He couldn’t possibly be lying to her. She told him that she believed him, but she wanted confirmation before the next meeting otherwise the group was going to stop. His smile reassured her that he’d be able to save it no problem.



“You want me to do what!?” Jay exclaimed at the top of his voice. He couldn’t believe his ears. “Why would you even ask me that?”

“Don’t get all excited,” Kerass responded his eyes commanding him to keep his voice down.

“Why?” Jay asked. He continued asking why he would ever want to join the peer support group. Kerass responded by reminding him of the unspoken event. Jay retorted that that was a low blow and only a moment of weakness. It wasn’t a reoccurring problem by any stretch.

“For me then,” Kerass said his voice barely above a whisper. “Please.”

Jay couldn’t bear to see Kerass look so glum, but he wasn’t going to budge. There was no way that he would ever join the peer support group. “I can’t promise you anything. I’ll think about it over the game.”

Kerass beamed. His smile showed that he was convinced he was winning the discussion. “Thanks Jay, you’re the best you know that?”

“Of course I know that but nothing’s been decided yet.”

Kerass’ smile kept getting bigger. “Sure,” he said utterly convinced he had won. “Snap it.” They slid their right hands over each other and snapped in unison. Kerass walked down the hallway. The new girl walked over to Kerass. Jay watched from the distance not daring to be seen but not daring to look away. They were talking and laughing about something stupid probably. So that was the reason that Kerass wanted to join the peer support group. Whoever the new girl was had some spell over him. Jay had never seen Kerass quite like this before. Kerass was never himself around girls. He was always the actor his part being the football stud. This was different though. It almost looked like actual flirting. Jay couldn’t stand the forced smiles. Well, they probably weren’t forced, but he didn’t want Kerass to smile at anyone other than himself like that. It had always been Kerass and Jay. This new girl wasn’t going to take away his best friend. At that moment he decided the play was back on but it was a different character and a different stage. His goal was to stop this new girl from stealing away his best friend. He only needed to find the perfect opportunity to execute it. His performance was about to begin.